We took Merilyn to the opening of an art show. She attracted more attention and stares than the paintings and you can see why. Why gaze at a canvas covered in paint when you can admire Merilyn day and night? No wonder Van Gogh cut off part of his ear for a woman. He’d have cut a bigger chunk off if he had met Merilyn. Obsessed ladies man Picasso would have given anything to paint Merilyn. She’s a living piece of art we’d love to mount. Her painting should hang in the Boobenheim Museum.